Saturday, 31 October 2009

Who the Hell is C dot L?!

Before I go on, let me point your attention to the fact that I made a rhyme in the title. If you overlooked this, then go back, re-read and start from the beginning again.

Excellent work to those of you who got it on the first time. Maybe next time for those of you who had to re-read it.

Any of you STILL unable to see the rhyme... Just click on some of the adverts... I recommend the one titled "Easy ways to quit drinking" Serina. :P

So, onwards we go to make sense of the actual TITLE of the post. Anonymous posts on my blog make me curious as to who's behind them. Lovely as they are.

One of my readers signs her posts with C.L(I say HER because of the delicate way in which she speaks... What guy says "bless ya neice" aside from flowerkid {seriously people, he's a 20 year old dude} but he's a special case...).

And it's got me thinking about people who I know who's name begin with C and L.

Cydney comes to mind straight away. Is it you?? If it's not Cydney then I'm sorry, tell me who you are!!! If it IS Cydney, you should be impressed at how I guessed it was you first time. If it's NOT Cydney, I'm not being cocky about it being Cydney. If it is, I am.

While we're on this topic: Who is dillrooba? Sorry if I spelled that wrong, I don't have the word infront of me to refer to. I'm equally interested in who you are.

Halloween is happening. And I'm at home on a bloody blog. This is depressing.
What should I do?

I think I'll go and watch some old Halloween episodes of Blue Peter and learn how to make a scary costume with nothing but a sheet of card and some straw.


Lesbian Chatrooms, you'll get as much action as you would on a Segway...

Some of you are well aware that I have placed adverts on my blog. Some more keen followers may have noticed how their theme changed from "Muslims in Poland" to "Vote For a New Party" to the current "Drug problem/drink aware" adverts.

The clever people at google have a way to adjust the adverts that appear on my site according to the content I display on it. So key phrases that I use in this blog will help to determine the kinds of adverts you lot will see in future.

So if I decide to list a few random words.. Let's say, I dunno...
Jessica Alba

I should have some interesting ads coming my way.
Of course, in order to make any revenue, I'd have to make them appropriate for my audience- YOU lot, so I should be talking about something you're interested in.


Cha ching.

...Here come the penis enlargment adverts...

Today I've been painting again. This time it was a slightly mauve/cream coloured paint and I DIDN'T spill any on my crotch area. Only ever happens with white paint. I suppose I'm glad; this sort of off white colour could still be mistaken for man-juice; just from a slightly ill man.

Halloween tonight. I've been looking forward to going crazy tonight but I'm a little tired from all the painting and the bed I'm in is just so damn comfy.

Which brings me on to a whole new topic of embarressment. When I left my parents house to go find independance, my dad took it as an oppertunity to demolish the hell out of my old bedroom and turn it into a study for himself. Fortunately, what with him working all the time, he only got to the demolishing part and left it at that. In this time, I'd left my job, come back to my parent's house- just in time to help my dad start working on it again. Laying flooring, painting walls fitting a door, that kinda stuff. For the last few weeks I've been weasling my way back into the home although I still don't have a bed here. It was one of the first things to get demolished.

I've only recently been given a temporary air bed to sleep on until I start and get paid for the aformentioned job ( a few posts ago ). It's only now that the air bed has started feeling nice to me, before it would flip up from under me if I lean too much on one side, it would randomly fill with air in certain pockets, it would bend in places. But now it fits to the contours of my back, I've fitted it with some nice pillows, I've placed it in the room my dad wants to be his study.

We all know this rooms gonna be mine soon.

In the days I've been waiting for my job to start, I've been getting bored at home. So much so that the other day I decided to try something new. I logged onto a lesbian chatroom.

Now I'm not a girl, or a lesbian one at that, but I'd like to think that IF I was a girl I'd be a lesbian. This excuse didn't sit well with the lesbians in the group. The sharp women worked out that since my name was winnerballs (inspired by looserballs but without the air of defeat that comes with it) I PROBABLY wasn't a woman.

"Yo" I start with.

Instantly I'm greated with three different replies. The other 40 women ignore me.

1) ...

Not a great start. I haven't heard the term ASL since I "cruised" through chat rooms as a twelve year old with friends pretending to be a cool 20 something year old. ASL meant Age, Sex Locaiton.

I decided to test the waters that night, see how these women take to a man invading their cyber-territory.

They do not take kindly to it.

When I said 20 M London, the one who asked said: Mofo.

The time we spent together was filled with such insults flung my way.

At one point though, they asked why I joined this particular chatroom rather than the mixed one.

Isn't it obvious? No dudes.

Then I tried reasoning with them. Perhaps insulting their intelligence and sexuality with really bad logic would make them like me more.

"Well, the way I see it, instead of having to find a partner AND a sex toy, I'm kinda like the two things in one right?"

Again with the insults. Eventually my desire to eat a biscuit outweighed my desire to roleplay naughty scenarios with an overweight 40 something year old mother of three. I logged out.

I didn't get kicked out.


Thank you peeps again, for reading, really appreciate the comments, keep them coming! And I'm seriously impressed that you lot have visited my site nearly THREE HUNDRED times in the space of a week! Much love. One time. Peak times. Respect.
And all of that nonsense.

See you in a few hours when I feel the urge to talk about my dinner or something...

Eddie Izzard you TWIT!

I'm new on Twitter, I find it's really interesting and fun. If you're on Twitter, give me a shout, my (tag?) (name?) (username?) is UMirza1 .

Anyway, twitter has this tool called trendsmap, I suppose it's for the socially retarded who need a website to tell them what other people nearby are talking about. Whatever, I thought I'd give it a click to see what it's about- how it works, etc.

It just shows big boxes full of topics that people in and around your area are talking about. Look at the picture below. Also in this picture, note how the ONE person who uses Twitter North of Leeds in the UK is using it to give a shout to Eddie Izzard...

I'm not sure that that isn't Eddie Izzard himself...

Friday, 30 October 2009

What do you think about the whole Race experiment?

I would be REALLY interested to know if any of you feel the same way as I do. Or if your opinion differs.

If you watched the show that is...

Let's face it, Nutt just likes the odd zoot.

DAVID NUTT has been sacked today because of his claims that cannabis, ecstacy and LSD are less dangerous than alcohol.
The imperial college of London professor described the government as Luddite and accused them of distorting the figures of cannabis and it's effects on people. Particularly picking up on the fact that Skunk (which has been the root of most figures claiming cannabis use leads to long term brain damage) and Cannabis are two completely different drugs- noting that the government uses figures of skunk when hitting home the dangers of cannabis.

Jacqui Smith, our home secretary asked professor Nutt to resign from his post for what seems to be the professor encroaching on the area of the government.

Nutt however stuck behind his claims, quoting the science behind his statement.

His paper stated that:

Alcohol ranks at the fifth most dangerous drug after heroin, cocaine barbiturates and methadone. Cannabis, LSD and ecstacy, while dangerous are ranked lower at 11, 14 and 18 respectively.

In 2004 cannabis was downgraded to a class C drug but has since been upgraded back to a class B. Smith stood behind her "precautionary principle" claiming that keeping cannabis as a class C drug would lead it to being dismissed as being unharmful.

This act sparked controversy among many people particularly since many surveys showed a decline in usage of cannabis after it's demotion to a class C drug. It led to prof. Nutt claiming the difference between a class C and class B drug is simply 5 years in prison.

From what I can make, of this whole thing, I would have to agree with this statement by the old prof. After all, if the government are ignoring or, sweeping the science under the carpet, then it appears that more harmful drugs (alcohol, cigarettes) are frowned upon less than those drugs which are branded as less harmful (cannabis) by the scientists themselves. It just feels like we are in a nanny state, where we simply don't know the actual truth behind the dangers of substances. As a spectator, I don't know the full ins and outs of the situation, but it seems as though the government made this move because Nutt stepped into their territory. Not because what he said was untrue but because he actually said what he did and the message it gives out to people. And rather than claiming that he is justifying the use of cannabis, which I haven't noted once, in fact just now on the telly I saw him vehemently discourage the use of any drugs, why don't the government turn this whole debacle on its head and focus more on the fact that drugs such as alcohol and tobacco are very harmful and something should be done to quell or moderate the amount of people whose lives are damaged by excessive use of these legitimised substances.

40% of people have, at some time, used cannabis.

Science media, and in fact many people within the science community feel that the government are simply ignoring scientists by dismissing Professor Nutt.
Contrastingly, many people, particularly parents, however feel that scientists aren't focusing on the damage these drugs cause on people on a more social level and that the drugs affect more than just the individuals using them, but their families and friends too.
In fact, Debra Bell- a parent... :\ ... claims that it is important that he got fired. She along with many other parents sent in petitions asking for him to be suspended after he wrote his paper claiming the tone of his message and that which people would gather from reading it would lead to more use of substances such as cannabis or LSD.

Regardless of the implications of his paper, as it stands, Nutt has discouraged the use of all harmful substances, simply claiming that the bands which the government use to tier drugs is unbalanced and it should be reformed to better reflect the nature of individual drugs and the risk they impose on one's health.

Because I know a lot of you don't watch the news.

More can be found on the guardian website or BBC News 24, channel 503 on Sky, Virgin Media channel 601 and on also on Freeview.

Hate mail can be sent to Jacqui at the following address though we'll probably all be under conservative government by the time it reaches her:

The Rt Hon Jacqui Smith MP

House of Commons, Westminster, London, SW1A 0AA

Or by email, though she's probably too busy trying to eat children to actually check her inbox:

And I don't even do weed...

Over 200 hits but we still live with racism. =(

Wow, we smashed past the 200 mark today. I say we again since I am quite a substantial contributor to my own visitor mark. I can't help it, I just want to see my baby grow.

This site has no aim. No structure, I'm just ambling through it aimlessly. I simply assume you are here to listen (read) every thought I consider relevant enough to type out.

Move arm left. Scratch myself.

I watched more in the series of Race:Sciences last taboo on Channel 4 today. I really enjoyed the show. I promise not to give you peeps another lecture like last time, but I will summarize it somewhat...

Thirty people took part in a social experiment. All from different races, skin colors, backgrounds, etc. What happened though was that they were segregated, not based on their skin color but on the color of their eyes. This goes to show that racial discrimination based on the color of a person's skin was just as arbitrary as the color of a persons eyes. Next, the people with blue eyes were to be bullied. From the get go. Upon splitting the people, the brown eyed people were told that those with blue eyes were to be made to feel what it was like to feel persecuted. Telling them that they had already been abusive, rude and making fun of racism.

None knew though that they themselves were to be abusive towards those with blue eyes.

After a while though, some of the people with brown eyes began rebelling. Some arguing that blue eyed people aren't all necessarily racist. One brown eyed white guy decided he would rather be on the blue eyed team, receiving the abuse rather than dishing it out.

He got chucked out of the experiment.

His rebellion worked to the woman's favor though since, it showed she had the power to expel whoever she chose.

After a few moments a second white person walked out.

The psychologists analyzing the people noted that it was the white people who decided to walk out of the experiment because they refused to acknowledge that racism was actually an issue among other white people.

"People in majority positions, powerful positions, white people mainly, don't see that there's a problem with racism and it's a really fundamental problem, they just don't SEE there's an issue"

After this, the remaining people become more docile to her, bending to her whim. At one point she says "All you have to do is act white, do you know how to act white?" at which point the group began laughing at the notion of being white.

Then in come the white people with blue eyes.
Ahh, I'd give you a more in depth synopsis but I really think it's worth watching, here's the link:

One really impressive part though was when a guy compared being discriminated against because he's fat, to being discriminated to for being black or brown.

"I go to the shop and want to buy a shirt but they don't have any in my size. Oh well I'll have to put up with it won't I?"

To which the organizer of the event says:

"You can lose your tubby, you can't change the color of your skin."

So by now, the blue eyed people, the people to whom this prejudice is being overtly directed towards are actually arguing that racism ISN'T a problem.

At one point, during their lunch break, one of the blue eyed ladies, annoyed that she is being called a racist and being treated differently, speaks among her blue eyed peers and says this:

"One third of my class are colored- are black children. I've got this one little girl, stunningly beautiful, who fell over scraped half her face, I admit I was slightly surprised that where she grazed her face it's all pink underneath. Right, did I expect it to be black? I don't know?"


Another point in the show, a mixed race man says he doesn't pick his daughter up from school because she has fair skin and he has darker skin than hers. She goes to a school where she is the only person of ethnic origin and because she has very white skin, he doesn't feel comfortable showing her origin to her friends.

When the lady who I quoted just a moment ago (Terry Taylor- A school teacher{!}) frowns in confusion, he confronts her saying, that he does so based on the 34 years he has lived in the country and the experiences he has had throughout his life in Britain.

Terry Taylor then replied saying her ex-husband wouldn't pick up her child in scruffy clothes and long messy hair with bad breath. Thus he too was a victim of prejudice and having to conform to society.

The idea behind the test isn't to show racism on a more isolated person to person scale, more of how people in power, on a larger scale affect individuals like racism on the scale of system to person.

This show was FUCKING awesome.

Ok, so it became a bit of a lecture. Sorry. I'm off to bed now. Sayonara!

Thursday, 29 October 2009

Kakashi for Hokage!

"Rasengan!" Shouted Naruto as he flew out from a cloud of smoke with such speed that it took Sasuke by complete surprise. Naruto kept low, grabbing at the earth with his free hand like a fox hurdling through the barren expanse. The gap between them closed in a flash and Naruto's Rasengan smacked Sasuke right in the bollocks.

From the distance Sakura writhed in agony and as she witnessed Sasuke's shorts shred off to reveal a tiny member which in turn ripped into tiny scraps of skin behind the force of Naruto's Rasengan; she screamed: "Sasuke!"

Her dreams of fathering Sasuke's child vanished with that fatal blow. Which was just as well really, because Sakura is a cold hearted bitch who's womb- a black vortex of dead creatures and bile encased in a viney, thorny membrane- would be no place to nurture a child. No, instead Sakura would grow old and bitter, her role relegated from a cannon character into little more than an occasional filler role. Fortunately for her though, her irregular appearances would do good for her popularity, though onlyunti lher next filler role (which sadly in Naruto occurs far too frequently) since after a scene or two, it would be blatantly apparent how arbitrary her role in Naruto is..

Though back to the fight scene, as Sasuke began to spew his stomache acid and blood from his mouth, Naruto looked down at him sadly. "Was this twat the guy I looked up to in so many of the beginning chapters of this manga? Was I really looking for him ever since the Orochimaru arc? Was this duche ever stronger than me? Believe it?" All thoughts running through his head.

Being a bit ditsy though, Naruto had forgotten that he had a Rasengan in his hand and as he moved to adjust his ninja plated headband, as he so frequently does, he shaved off his own head, killing himself instantly. This released the demon fox from his neck.

But it was a tight squeeze for the poor kyuubi who had to squeeze his whole body out of Naruto's bloody jugular. This was no easy feat but through biting and gnawing and ripping at naruto's severed neck he eventually created a cravass big enough to wedge his head out of.

Unfortunately that was as far as the willy Kyuubi got as the neck was just TOO small for the rest of his body. He had to carry on for the rest of his life in the body of a pre-adolescent boy with the head of a gigantic fox.

Fortunatly, the people of Konoha were not too unlike Naruto- in that they were all more or less moronic enough to scratch their heads while holding an Rasengan in their hands- so they assumed that since the demon fox was wearing Naruto's customary Orange and black outfit, that it was Naruto in the outfit. Who just went a bit excessive with the face paint.


With the Naruto sheesh...
I'm just a little annoyed that that shit goes on and on and on forever without any real plot progression. Although the few times it DOES progress is through some sort of Deus Ex Machina schemed thing where the Hero or Villain suddenly gets some mystical power from out of nowhere.

But Kakashi's Mangekyu Sharingan looks awesome. Even awesome-er than Madara's. Even though it's not.

All of this typing has got me hungry for something.

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

Ah... Crap.

Five days ago I started this baby and now I've had a hundred and fifty hits.
This is sweet. Awesome in fact. Thanks guys.

Firstly, I'd like to say that I am suffering terrible food poisoning inflicted by (someone else's) bad cooking. If I have to suddenly make a dash for it to the bathroom in order to relieve my stomach, you probably won't notice. But I'll be sure to let you know. In detail.

So, what do you think about the Royal Mail Strikes? Has it actually affected you in a major way? Who actually uses mail these days? I mean, of course there are loads of businesses and people who do online shopping and well, the list could go on and on, but on a level aimed at you readers, who relies on mail anymore? And who has a sense of URGENCY regarding their mail?

Personally, I'm never expecting letters. They come, oh they come regularly, but when they do, I read them, I don't think I've ever found myself running to the front door, seeing that I have no mail and cursing the world with my fist in the sky asking "WHY!?"
When I have a parcel coming, it's normally from a website that doesn't use Royal Mail. And isn't there a cap for the number of times people are allowed to strike for? I won't pretend to know what the ins and outs are of this strike, I hear something about job cuts in order to make the service more efficient due to a waning demand for the Royal Mail service. Surely something about money too right?

And that just about peeks my interest for this whole Royal Mail debacle. Let's move onto a more interesting topic.


Windows 7 has been out a while now and I can't wait to get my hands on it. I tried out the RC when they released it and it was so much faster than Vista! I also want to use it for its multi-touch interface but that means having to buy a new monitor! I'm nervous about mentioning Windows 7 too many times because I'm sure my adverts will start changing away from "Polish Muslims" (Which I find amusing) to "Windows 7" which just won't be as much fun.

Maybe Microsoft will pay more than Polish wives though...


Windows 7
Windows 7
Windows 7
Windows 7
Windows 7
Windows 7


So that should ensure me some new flashy adverts.

What do we think about the U.S proposal to pay out members of the Taliban in Afghanistan something along the lines of $20 a month in order for them to stop being militia for the Taliban?

Yeah, stuff...

Stomach just went funny, think I might need the loo.


Tuesday, 27 October 2009

One hundred visits!

Wohoo! Today, we hit past the one hundred visits mark! Admittedly, only 12 of them were probably from people other than myself, but I'm seriously impressed. This blogs only been up and running for... 4 days? That's quite something in my opinion. Thanks to those of you who have been reading, thanks for the comments, thank you all the people who've gone through the hassle of following me and also a thank you for the people supporting me by clicking on the adverts! You can also do Google searches at the bottom of the page peeps.

A really big Thank You to Umar, who has helped me through the whole process of making a blog, and actually convincing me that blogging was a good idea. Thank you very much.

You can visit his blog too, it's based on Football and has really good sports writing, details on football matches he's watched. It's a good read. the website is

Hope you enjoy.

Anything new happen today? Not really. I left a really, really special person waiting for TWO hours today. Over two hours. I got to meet her just as she was preparing to leave where she was waiting. Few. And even though she was mad, she STILL took the time to go over some maths work with me and eat into her OWN time. So I would like to take this opportunity to really, sincerely say that even though you were strongly considering walking out on me today, I STILL managed to charm my way into spending an afternoon in Trucadero with you!! HAHAHAHA!!! :P

And that I'm sorry.

Really, seriously sorry.

On channel Four last night, there was a really interesting program called Race and intelligence, Sciences Last Taboo, where a reporter was trying to look for evidence as to whether there was any truth behind the notion that some races are genetically intellectually superior to others.

This isn't the case. All that one crackpot theorist had to say was that Asian women tend to have larger pelvis bones, followed by White women and finally women who are Black have, on average smaller pelvis bones. He hypothesized that this was because black babies are born with smaller heads because they have smaller brains and thus are less intelligent.


But there were many theories and pieces of information put out in that show.
A guest on the show was James R. Flynn, who has theorized that there is a rise in the average IQ test scores over generations. Essentially stating that as years go by, people's IQ's are getting higher and higher. On carrying out studies, it appears that average IQ grows by around 3 points per decade.
This is true to the extent that, if the children of 1932 were to do an IQ test set in 1997, half of the children would be classified as being borderline mentally retarded.

The extent of growth has varied over years and also between countries. It seems that developed countries' rate of growth has slowed down. Where as developing countries rate has continued to grow.

Of course this is only a short scaled diagram. If it were applied over a longer period of time, it would subsequently imply that Aristotle had an IQ of -1000.

Enough of the lecture, watch TV or something, I suggest Channel 4's Race week thing. Every night at 10 I think? Perhaps. Today's episode is gruesome looking.


Monday, 26 October 2009

Cook without the book

So recently, my mother has gone off to Pakistan. We're sharing the workload between us. Man she did a LOT of work... :| Since I moved back home (due to lack of employment and subsequently lack of pay and lack of rent) I've been cooking loads and it got to a point where I could no longer justify feeding my dad egg and toast twice a day...

You know what, I just want to say, Fifteen minutes ago when I started this blog I was officially unemployed. I just got a call to say I got a job to a place I applied for a while back. Let me compose myself and get back on topic.




Ah, OK. Well, the reason I started writing this blog is that recently I've been doing a tonne of cooking at home. And I've decided that along with doing this cooking, I could pass on my adventures in the kitchen with some of you. I've noticed that I'm pretty crap at cooking yet I cook more and attempt more dishes than most people I know. So alongside recipes that I'll try, I'll also post some videos- perhaps on Youtube- of myself cooking them.

This whole job things thrown a curve ball into my plans for this post. Insert witty banter at your own discretion.

Take care 'til next time!

Sunday, 25 October 2009

Malgan Sigumchi Kuk

Would you eat something called that?
Possibly. After finding out it's Korean for Clear spinach soup? Not so keen on it myself...

But the word has won my heart over, I'm saying it again and again. In a survey- I heard this from a Ricky Gervaise Podcast some years ago- to find Brittain's favorite word, serendipity came at the top. I have to agree with Mr. Gervaise that this is ridiculous. Who in Earth uses that word for more than the title of that ONE film? If I had to pick a word based on the frequency of it's use, my favourite would probably be... I? I think it might be the most frequent word in my blog.

But what? You want me to write about YOU and YOUR day?! Pah...

Right now I've got my iPod on shuffle and it's got me listening to Usher- Can U Handle it? Now typically this is where I'd make an excuse about how my sister took my iPod and put her music on it- don't deny that you've made something up along those lines- but I actually like listening to some of his stuff. Just not this one in particular. So I'll skip to the Postal Service- We Will Become Silhouettes. Ah, that's more like it.

Been doing more D.I.With.My.Dad today... That sounds a little-the meaning could be OBSCURED to mean something perverse... I'll simply stick to D.I.Y form now on...
But yeah, I've been doing that today, bit of a slacking day though, all we did was paint walls. Was good fun though and I started feeling comfortable climbing higher than the third step on the ladder to reach the higher parts of the walls.

UNsupervised! I know, cool right? The annoying thing though, was that dispite being as careful as I could be, I got white paint on suspect areas of my jogging bottoms. a little dab RIGHT on my thigh, perfectly positioned to accure the maximum ammount of coverage and vis a vis, humiliation. I carry on painting and get a great big dab spilled in a nearby region. Hey, look at the plus side, at least this makes it look like I'm shooting like a fire engine hose.

If anyone were to try insult me because of this white mess on my leg, they'd hesitate due to the sheer volume of my "Load".

So the Postal Service has got me talking dirty, let's see what Daft Punk's- Digital Love, has me saying...

A grainy film is on the telly. Attractive woman, man in suit, nice watch but back is to camera. Woman starts kissing man. Second attractive woman bursts into room... Ah James Bond.
My niece walks into the room...
Two women, one James Bond + one very curious and vocal two year old niece = one very dead uncle.

"Mummy, what do women and men do naked with a gun?"

Would not like to be in the room when that happens... I switch to any other channel. At which point my niece says - remember she's two- "614". Six one four, is the number of the television channel that Cebeebies is on. She loves Cebeebies.
On a seperate occasion, the kid says to my dad, "Nana Abu (grandad), cebeebies." To which my dad responds, I don't know what channel that is. She replies, "six one four". He types it in and nothing. (That's the number on Sky, my dad was was using Virgin Media...)

"It's not working" He said. To which Nusayba (my niece) ponders momentarily only to come back with: "Youtube?"

At two. And the other day, I left her alone with the lappytoppy, to see her navigating through the videos by herself! And each time she loads a new Charlie and Lola video, she exhales in a content "Ahhh", wriggles herself comfortable in her seat and goes into a trance.

Coldplay have had far too many turns on this shuffle, Let's give the Flobots a go- The Rythm Method (Move!)

Football is on at the moment. I don't follow footie that much. It's too long to sit through and there's too much faffing about in the middle of the pitch before theres an ALMOST goal. Then a few minutes for the goalie to pick up the ball. Kick it BACK in the middle, again with the faffing. Repeat for 90 minutes. A few goals if you're lucky. That said, international football is more interesting. More patriotism I guess. Especially since I support (Nationally) Manchester United, manchester being a city I haven't even been to yet. Not easy to build up a major ammount of support for them.

This with the patriotism and stuff, gets me thinking about America and why they call football Soccer. A quick google search (By the time I have typed "Why do ame" It's already second in the search prediction, obviously a much posted question) provides me with the answer. Or AN answer. Apparantly, the higher classes in Britain would call it soccer rather than football, though the dregs of society would refer to it as Football. I get bored of reading further but if you would like to learn about it, the link is:

So I take it our aristocrocy used to spell mum as mom?


But then our aristocrocy had porphyria and blue wee.


I'll leave it there for now- Superman 2 is on!

Word Up.

We've more than hit expectations with five followers in two days! Hurrah! Huzzah! Hurray!
With all the early adopters of the fireworks frenzy going all out with their poppers and sparkly whizzes or whatever the hell they've opted for, I'm slightly on edge with all the banging sounds I'm hearing tonight. It's lead me to veer away from the from of my house and put on my one working headphone and listen to some music. I have opted for... Kid Cudi - Make her say. Nice.

I'm really tired today since I've spent the whole day doing D.I.Y with my dad. I don't think he gets the concept of D.I.Y. Particularly the Y part. YOURSELF! not D.I.WithYour.Son...
Not hating though because it was actually quite fun after a while. Laid some flooring, put in some skirting boards, dealt with some tricky plumbing. It's taken a lot out of me- my eyes are drooping like the fanny of a granny.

Throughout the day I took regular breaks from handing my dad tools. My excuses varied from needing the loo to some slightly more imaginative ones such as: "the sawdust from the exhaust of your electric saw has lodged itself in my nostrils".
I would invariably end up at my laptop skimming through either Facebook or Twitter or this Blog or Youtube or MSN or The Guardian Website or some other website.

Throughout the day I came across some really funny stuff that I made a mental note to relay to you peeps. Firstly, a BBC correspondent spoke of Pakistan's military closing in on the home town of the leader of the Pakistani Taliban. The news reporter went on to say:

"Hakimullah Mehsud (the taliban leader) is responsible for committing several suicide attacks within the region..."

Err... Several... Suicide attacks?? That doesn't add up; surely after one you've kinda depleted your ability to strike again, what with all the suicide-ing...

It made me smile.

In a similarly humorous flurry of ill picked words-
While surfing through Youtube, I came across the most awesome video game trailer I've seen.

Left 4 Dead 2.

Looks good. The title of the video clip was "Leaked Left 4 Dead Trailer" and the video quality along with the length and publicity it has gathered led some skeptics to claim that it wasn't leaked but instead intentionally broadcast by the creators. Fair dinkum to them, but one guy decided to comment by saying:

Leaked my ass

not the best choice of words....

On one last note, if you like my stuff and you would like to support me, just spend a few moments going to some of my advertisers. They're automatically relevant through Google's magical powers of mind reading. Or something.


Saturday, 24 October 2009


One day and TWO followers! Wow, if things keep going like this, in TWO days, I should have... I can't even imagine!
(Four- we are aiming for four...)

I was just on a video streaming site and came across the category:

Common Videos.

And this made me, to some degree not want to watch the videos. The connotations of the word common lead to me thinking "Err.." for a few moments before even making my mind up based on the videos themselves.
On a similar streaming site, however, I often find myself skimming through the section:

Popular Videos.

Which, ultimately means the same thing as common- videos that have been seen a lot. And this just got me thinking about how particular words, depending on the context, it can be seen to mean so many different things.

People have things in common; often a good thing.
A commoner; not quite so good.
Common sense; again with the good...
common ground; one more for good.
Common; not quite so much.

This all ties in with a TV show my two year old niece was watching where the character's went to a magical land where everything was wonderful and fluffy and made of fairy dust.

In this world, there was a LOT of candy. And what is that telling my little niece? Candy good.
Candy nice. Me want Candy.
She's not exactly old enough to consider the implications of excessive candy consumption and while her mother isn't one to let her at the sweets cupboard without supervision- I'm just worried with regards to the implications this kind of imagery has on her developing (and increasingly greedy) mind...

And in the same vein, while watching Question Time on the television last night, I was perplexed to see that Nick Griffin got away with making false accusations about Muslims (regarding women and their rights in Islam) and furthermore claiming they were quotes from the Quran. The fact that these were not refuted on the whole, gives rise to the possibility that people ignorant on the matter could take away from watching the show that Islam actually upholds those views.

Which it doesn't.

Considering people take away chunks of information from shows like that, to have Nick Griffin bashing Muslims and then have Baroness Warsi bashing extremist Muslims (in a sort of attempt to battle the Muslim corner) it just seems that many people may take away from this particular debate that Muslims are people it's OK to hate on.

I was in two minds about if having Nick Griffin on Question Time was a good idea. The idea that he was being considered a legitimate politician in such a popular TV show (on a side note, this episode in particular hit THREE times the regular broadcast figures) was- is disgusting.

Though, isn't he already?
Hasn't his party got two seats in the European Parliament? The fact that he is seen as a credible candidate by our leaders and is being "humoured" to some extent means that the BBC aren't in any wrong for letting him on the show.
Ultimately all I could hope for was that he would make a larger fool of himself than he did of the viewers. In my opinion, that's what happened, with his inability to answer questions directly, his uncomfortable demeanour, the way he was treated by the audience and the other panelists, it all made for some enjoyable viewing. But then, the fact that he got away with having some of his views publicised to such a large audience leaves me worried and with a bitter taste in my mouth.

What if, by humoring him, and by playing along with his game, we allow for Griffin to rally enough votes through his new, more seemingly "tolerant" approach. In a distorted rendition of the tale of the tortoise and the hare. With Nick Griffin being the racist tortoise. (He DOES look like a tortoise... It's the eyes.) And though many people will be capable of seeing through his thinly veiled fascism, the support he will have (and has already) garnered is undeniable. While to some extent, it is within the power of our leaders to bar Nick Griffin and his party from politics at present, if they are allowed to spread their hate campaigns and to fester within the population, I fear that eventually, within the shadows, their support will have exceeded the precipice of socio-cultural degradation.

Where the national front, the BNP, the UKIP had handfuls of followers from around the country, they have managed to amass (be it through frustration at other parties' policies or anything else at all...) hundreds of thousands of votes to enable them to decide on key issues in Europe.

In his acceptance speech during the EU elections, Griffin said:

"liberal elite which has built a dam, a wall of lies which has grown ever taller and ever thicker over the years to stop ordinary people protesting about the removal of their freedom."

When Nick Griffin uses the term "ordinary people" I for one, and I'm sure countless others don't include themselves in his warped definition of ordinary. Though there are those that do.
It goes back to what I was saying about the way a word is used. The phrase indigenous British or White or heterosexual or Christian wouldn't have looked as glossy in that speech, yet it is this ideology of THEM and US that lies at the core of everything he says and his party represents.

We all fall victim to things like this. Commercials regarding alcohol sold through the imagery of women. Perfumes again using women. Fizzy drinks using fit, healthy men.

"Get pissed on WKD and you'll be loved up by them birds..."
No, you'll be at home washing the vomit from your shirt tomorrow.

"Lynx chocolate will have women biting your arms off..."
It's actually Lynx Africa that smells the best... And chocolate hasn't ever worked for me.

"Drinking Pepsi is as cool as riding a skateboard on rooftops"
I don't think they quite nailed it at Pepsi...

Buying a crap computer from Dell- with double memory, double gloss and double the hard drive capacity until the 4th of november- sucks, but it's not life altering and it won't affect the world at large. Having a party like the BNP gain more seats will have long lasting ramifications for Britain- which is a big international power.

This post has to end somewhere and it's gone past 2.45 in the morning...

Friday, 23 October 2009

Welcome, one and all !!

Ramblings, musings, rants, opinions, one and all spewed over the interweb by yours truly in a fashion not dissimilar to that of an awkward teen on Youtube discussing why "Kimberly Ashton is like, such a bitch".

OK, perhaps not the greatest preliminary sentence in a blog ever but this is a work in progress. And I've just warmed to the idea of these things. Let me get "Ma thang on"- then I promise fireworks. I feel I should introduce myself. Is that what you generally do at this point? I'm getting quite hot and flustered. Eek.

But no, let's do this.
I'm Usman Mirza, 20 year old dude, Asian- as the name may suggest, though I was born and raised my whole life in Britain. At this moment I'm listening to Kasabian- Fire. Through only one headphone though, since I seem to have misplaced the rubber encasing of the left ear bud. Which Sucks.
Enough to get a mention on my first blog.
So on a more specific scale, I live in London. The East side of London, the more... Homey (for want of a better word) side, when contrasted with the cleaner, brighter, grander, more affluential West London. You've got South and North London but I've never paid much attention to them. :/

Some of you will have come to this site as a product of my incessant nagging. Haha, I kid. SOME?! At this point, I know all of you so the introduction earlier was completely arbitrary though I hope in the coming weeks, months (years?!) that'll change and someone other than my mum will be reading this and subsequently will kinda validate the introduction.

I've decided that listening to Kasabian was doing more harm than good to this post, (the prelude about getting junk in my system - Bad imagery.) so I've opted for Vampire Weekend now- Walcott.

Ah that interjection has left me in an awkward place now... Do I carry on introducing myself or move on to something more topical for the majority of you who already know me? Let's do a bit of both, I'll introduce something about myself that most of you won't know.

I just ate a pear.

OK, maybe something a little more relevant (though the pear has left my belly feeling a little odd- it was far too ripe) to the rest of you...

So... Obama is President huh? Cool. That is pretty cool..

OK, so we've discovered that I'm quite narcissistic. Though that is evident through my decision to write a blog isn't it?

Dudes and dudettes, I'm out since I gots stuff to do! However, be sure to check out the ensuing posts since they will be full of provocative immagery, mild humour and smaller words!