Fifty posts later...

And a couple of megabytes of data,
And a few pages worth or writing,
And tens of hours worth of effort,
And thousands of words,
And hundreds of thousands of letters,
And numerous personal boundaries discarded,
And a few strangers comments,
And one messy break up,
And a couple of anecdotes later.............

I'm still here.

Thick skin...


And nothing better to do.

Good god, please let my job start soon! I'm actually going bizzerk. On the verge of losing it. Not just silly losing it, I mean seriously, fake maths and poetry doodled on the wall with shit losing it. Foaming at the mouth biting my own leg losing it. Clapping my elbows together while trying to draw a map of London around my bellybutton losing it.

I've already made plans for the money I'm gonna ear and how to spend it. Driving lessons. Or moving out? Which takes precedence? I'm at a loss. Well, really, starting the ACTUAL JOB takes precedence, but let's ASSUME it begins. One day...

I need to get the heck out of here. Any young nubile women feeling similarly....

Get a room dammit! Can't you see I'm simply on the rebound and will NOT be a pleasant person to be living with. Sheesh.

I am well impressed with how easily you can google looserballs. Go on, do it. It'll show up straight away! Like top 5. I mean, it DOES recommend that perhaps you meant loose balls. Which I can't begin to understand the logistics behind... Loose balls?!

Hi! I'm Barry Scott. Notice how your balls aren't QUITE as loose as that guy next to you? Perhaps you find it hard to sleep at night, what with having such tightly wound nuts? Well, scrounge about in your pants no more! With new Cillit-Balls! Watch how it unwinds even the tightest screwed balls with just one spray!



Before



After

Cilit BALLS! And the unsightly pain in your scrotum is GONE!


Shut up, it's late at night and I can't sleep... Not even night anymore, it's actually more morning than night. Some people wake up at this time. Bloody hell. Enough. Go google something.